Do We Love As We Should?

If it hadn't been for his wife, 82-year-old George Murphy may not have survived his brutal encounter with a moose on Jan. 20, 2012.

Murphy and his 85-year-old wife Dorothea Taylor had just finished exercising their dogs near the Willow, Alaska, airport when a large bull moose began to charge Murphy. With no trees to hide behind, Murphy dove into a snow bank to hide. But the angered moose quickly found him and began stomping on the retired man's body.

Hearing the commotion, Taylor—who stands 5 feet tall and weighs 97 pounds—jumped out of the truck and grabbed a shovel from the bed of the pickup. With nothing but the shovel and some courage, Taylor managed to bludgeon the beast into stopping its attack. "I hit it with everything I had," she told the Anchorage Daily News. -World, January 25, 2012

It's pretty obvious that Mrs. Taylor had a deep love for her husband in the above story. Her love for her husband was strong enough that she risked her own life to come to his rescue. Similarly, God loved US so much that he even sent his own son to die for OUR sins (John 3:16)!

There are things in our lives that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, and of good report (Philippians 4:8). You might even say that they are virtuous and worthy of praise! As I sit here thinking about it, three things come to mind. They are: faith, hope, and love. These are virtues that are joined together in several passages (1 Corinthians 13:13; 1 Thessalonians 1:3). And yes, they are certainly virtues worthy of praise and careful reflection.

Today, I would like to focus our attention on one of these virtues: love. The Greeks had four words for love...

1. eros - carnal, sexual love, properly reserved for marriage (cf. Hebrews 13:4).
2. philia - the love of close friendship, such as brotherly love (cf. John 11:3).
3. storge - the love of family relationships
4. agape - that love which seeks the highest good of others

It's unfortunate that the English word "love" is not as clearly defined.

Let's take a closer at look at two of these types of love, philia and agape. It's common to make the following distinction between the two:

a. agape - active good will, as that which is commanded;
b. philia - fondness, heartfelt affection, as that which cannot be forced

Yet the distinction between the two is not always clear cut. "Agape" can also be defined as "brotherly love, affection" - Thayer, Strong. And "philia" is often commanded in the Scriptures (cf. Romans 12:10; 1 Corinthians 16:22). But, perhaps we shouldn't make too much distinction between the two.

Now let's reflect on the duties we have in regards to love. First, love is demanded of us! We are commanded to love God and Jesus. According to scriptures, we are commanded to love (agape) God heart, soul, mind, and strength (Mark 12:30). We are also commanded to love (philia) Jesus, more than family (1 Corinthians 16:22; Matthew 10:37). As you can see, the greatest command of the Law, is definitely reinforced in the Gospel!

We are also commanded to love our brethren. We are to love (agape) one another as Christ loved us (John 13:34-35). We are to be kindly affectionate (philostorgos, love of family) to one another with brotherly love (philadelphia, fraternal affection) - Romans 12:10. Simply put, we are to love with brotherly love that is affectionate and demonstrative to others.

We are commanded to love our families. This means that husbands are to love (agape) their wives (which includes to cherish) - Ephesians 5:25,28-29. Wives are to love (philandros, to love as a friend) their husbands - Titus 2:4. And mothers are to love their children (philoteknos, to be fond of one's children) - Titus 2:4. We are love our families with heartfelt affection that should only be natural in families!

We are also commanded to love our neighbors and enemies. I know that this can sometimes be easier said than done. However, we are commanded to love (agape) our neighbor (Mark 12:31). And we are commanded to love (agape) our enemies (Matthew 5:4) with active good will that allows no distinction between friend and foe
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As the people of God, we are certainly to be a loving people. But where love is weak, how can it be made strong...?

Our second duty, in regards to love, is how love is developed. There are several ways in which our love can be developed and made stronger. It is taught by God. This, of course, concerns brotherly love (philadelphia) to love one another (agape) - 1 Thessalonians 4:9. He shows us by way of example (how He sent His Son) - 1 John 4:9-10; Romans 5:8. It's should be pretty obvious that God teaches us how to love one another!

Love is taught by Jesus. We see this by way of example (how He was willing to die for us) - 1 John 3:16. We see this in how He loved (philia and agape) His disciples (John 11:3,5); in Lazarus, Mary, Martha (John 13:1,34); in the disciples (John 13:23); and in John (John 20:2). Through these examples, and many more, Jesus teaches us how to love one another!

Love is taught by Paul, who taught Christians how to walk in love (Ephesians 5:1-2); taught husbands how to love their wives (Ephesians 5:25-33); and who practiced brotherly love (agapetos, beloved, dear) - cf. Philippiansp 4:1. Paul teaches us how to love in word and example!

Peter teaches us how to love, as well. He taught us to love one another (philia and agape) fervently (1 Peter 1:22; 4:8); taught us to love (agape) the brotherhood, as brethren (philadelphos) (1 Peter 2:17; 3:8); and practiced brotherly love (agapetos, beloved, dear) - cf. 2 Peter 3:15. Peter too, teaches us how to love in word and example!

Did you know that Christians should teach each other how to love? Older women should be capable of teaching the younger women (Titus 2:3-4). Even young Christians can set an example of how to love (1 Timoty 4:12; 2 Thessalonians 1:3). Clearly, fellow Christians (young and old) can teach us to love one another!

Finally, we (ourselves) can develop heartfelt affection. We can enhance philia love by adding agape love to it (cf. 2 Peter 1:7). Additionally, by displaying agape (active good will), philia (heartfelt affection) will follow - cf. 1 Thessalonians 4:9. Either way, the key to having heartfelt affection towards others is to be kind to them!

Now, here are a few final thoughts on how true love manifests itself. It (love) can be demonstrated in several ways. It can exemplified by God and Jesus. God's love was manifested by sending His Son to die for our sins (John 3:16; 1 John 4:10). Jesus' love was demonstrated by dying for us (John 15:13; 1 John 3:16). One could say that true love is sacrificial!

Love can be explained by John. It can be demonstrated in deed and in truth (1 John 3:17-18); and demonstrated by obeying the commands of God (1 John 5:2-3). True love is demonstrative and exemplary!

Love is expounded by Paul. He taught us that:

1. Love suffers long and is kind
2. Love does not envy
3. Love does not parade itself, is not puffed up
4. Love does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil
5. Love does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth
6. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things
7. Love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:4-8).

True love is everlastingly kind, patient, humble, polite, and assumes the best in others!

In the end, we might ask ourselves, "What is love...?" It is heartfelt affection toward God and man. And it is active good will toward everyone! Where we lack heartfelt affection and active good will we need to acknowledge the deficiency (as an indication of spiritual immaturity). We need to be willing to relearn love.

When we need to learn to love others with a heartfelt love look to the Father, to Jesus, to the apostles, and to other Christians. Take the initiative to practice active good will, and heartfelt affection will develop naturally.

Mahatma Gandhi once said, “I like your Christ but I dislike your Christians. They are so unlike your Christ.” While we might find that assessment harsh, it nonetheless points up one of our great challenges in living our faith: Are we showing others Jesus in our lives by our actions? Are we letting Him work through us?

Dear friends, we have been born again, purified to have heartfelt, affectionate love for one another (philadelphia). But, do we love one another (agape) as intently as we should? (cf. 1 Peter 1:22-23).

Prayer: Lord, make me into the type of Christian who will bring honor to Your name. Amen

God bless you,

Jocelyn